Speaking Grace in our Homes and Local Churches

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” – Ephesians 4:29

The New Testament uses family language to describe the local church. We are brothers and sisters, the household of God, and as Paul says in Ephesians 4, “we are members one of another.” We belong to one another and labor with great care the building up of this household for God’s pleasure. Our heavenly Father commands your mouth, which He created for His good pleasure, to speak grace toward the ears of His beloved church to build her up.

The reality of Christ’s cleansing of your heart is displayed in the purity of our speech (Luke 6:45). Our Lord commands your mind renewed and heart pure to love His church, and He sanctifies His beloved by His truth to put away “all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander along with malice” and “be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:31-32).

In this new year, make this doctrine an emphasis in your home. Encourage your household how to think purely and speak about purely the other households in the church of Jesus Christ. This means our marriages and homes must be atmospheres which greatly discourage corrupting talk and commands repentance for corrupting thoughts of other members of the local church. This also means we must cultivate homes with the foundation of Christ’s peace to speak only what is good for building up and speaking grace to one another.

There is something beautiful in speaking blessing to one another. Whether another family in our church family is struggling or well, communicate blessing to their ears to hear. “God bless your home with His peace, brother,” is something that must resound in the hallways of a church building far more than criticism. May God grant you wisdom, restore peace and joy, comfort you and your home, protect you for the evil one, remind you and your home of His steadfast love and mercy. 

To speak a blessing, not simply as the act itself but from the heart, can only come from a Christ-like love and care for each other with tenderness and forgiveness (vs32). A genuine love from someone being matured in Christ to labor and build up His church in peaceful unity (Ephesians 4:12-13). May God bless you and your home by His truth that you may bless the other members of Christ’s church. May He build us up for His good pleasure.

Heavenly Father, forgive our hearts of any corrupting thoughts and purify our hearts and minds by Your truth. As You have forgiven us in Christ, grant us tenderness to forgive others in Christ. Grace our mouths, which You have created for Your good pleasure, to speak grace in our homes and toward one another. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

One Day...

One day, I will be able to take a nap in the afternoon. I will be able to enjoy an evening to read a book in peace. I will be able to take my time to quietly shop at the grocery store. I will be able to go out to eat with my wife without having to hire babysitters. I will be able to go to bed and wake up when I want to. I will be able to eat a meal in peace without my children noisily interrupting.

One day, I will not have to fight frustration while I discipline the children. I will not have to clean spilled milk off the floor that my son made while trying to pour his own drink. I will not have to scrub crayon marks off of the walls that my daughter doodled. I will not have to pay so much money to feed growing kids. My wife and I will not have to juggle so much of our crazy busy schedule or have so much laundry and dishes to do.

One day my life will not be so busy and my home will be quiet. I'm not looking forward to that day. I have to ask the Lord for grace to remember this each time I become frustrated or stressed, longing for a peaceful moment.

God says that children are a heritage He gives me, and I am blessed to have many (Psalm 127:3-5). I am often reminded from older Christians that I will one day look back on these days as the best days of my life. I need to hear that encouragement often. I think that this is something we all need to hear.

Dear reader, I don't know what chapter of life you are in. A teenager may think that one day she will be an adult and life will be more fun out from under her parents' house. A stressed out young mother may think that things will be more stable when the kids are a little older. A man may think life will be more enjoyable once he retires. An empty-nester may think his life will be more fun when he has grandchildren. Worse, perhaps you think you have nothing more to look forward to in life.

Truth is, right now is the best day of your life because God has given this day to you to rejoice in and glorify Him. Each morning, He is faithful to give us grace to see His new mercies (Lamentations 3:23). His new mercies are good and perfect gifts for you in this season of your life. We live life now to glorify God, and we also do look forward to one day.

One day, we will not age. We will run and not grow weary. We will not attend any more funerals. We will not long for better days. One day our tears will be wiped away by our Lord for the last time. That is a day I look forward to. That day is what brings me joy today. No matter the stress and noise today may bring, I know today has purpose in the everlasting day that is to come.

Let us rejoice in all things (I Thessalonians 5:18, Philippians 4:4), even the trying things today may bring. Let us not grumble (Philippians 2:14), for today God has given us mercy. Let us not grow weary in doing good (Galatians 6:9), for the everlasting day is coming...one day.

Grumpiness

“Love is not rude. Love does not insist on its own way. Love is not irritable.” – I Corinthians 13:5

Grumpiness. I hate the feeling. I hate how being grumpy hurts my wife’s feelings. I hate how being grumpy makes me sharp towards others. I hate how being grumpy makes the day seem longer. It seems that on days I am grumpy my memory of the bed I wake from is all I look forward to. Grumpy days are days I want to just end.

The word for “irritable” in this verse means to be provoked. Meaning, love does not respond to provocation with grumpiness, rudeness, and demanding our own way. God is love (I John 4:8), and the desire of the follower of Jesus is to be like God. God is long-suffering; His fuse is long. Not mine. My fuse is short. I get grumpy because I insist on my own way, and I harbor prideful rudeness in my heart when I don’t get my way. When I get tired, or feeling bad, or I’m in a hurry, or I’d rather be doing something else, and I don’t get my way, I get grumpy and rude. 

To fight for joy, we must first be reminded that rudeness and grumpiness is unlovingness that is rooted in prideful sin. Confess your bitter attitude and grumpiness as pride, insisting your own way, as a sin before God. We must ask ourselves what is “our own way” that we are demanding that is making us rude, negative, and grumpy, even if we must stop in the middle of a sentence and take a breather to do it. We must ask what is the way of love found in the Bible? We must repent and walk in the Spirit and bear fruit (Galatians 5:22-23). Do I trust that God has the power to deliver me from being grumpy and rude and more like Jesus?

God will finish the good work He began in us (Philippians 1:6), and He is at work in those days when we are grumpy and demand our own way. We must lay aside that selfishness and be a people known by God’s love, a love that is not rude, insisting our own way, and grumpy. Seek the Savior to deliver you from these bonds, knowing the gradual but glorious work to lay aside grumpiness for love is a fight for joy.

Heavenly Father, we confess our pride, wanting our way rather than Your way, wanting our way rather than to love. Forgive us, and through Jesus reconcile us to Yourself and to others we may have harmed in our selfish rudeness and grumpiness. We are clay in the Potter’s hands. Mold us. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

How God Answered My Prayer Today

The Lord answered my prayer, but not in the manner I expected Him to.
Each week, I look at my large desk calendar (yes, I'm old school) and find a day to take off. It's part of my routine, in keeping with what I was taught by a mentor of mine: your family is your primary ministry. This week, Tuesday was the only possible day. Nothing major was planned. Perhaps a trip to the park. Whatever we will do, it all involves getting dressed. My lovely wife was standing at the bottom of the stairs that leads to our boys' room helping Levi figure out what to wear. It was at this moment our day changed.

Anyone who has ever had a toddler in their home knows toddlers trip all of the time. Selah is no different. Her knees are scraped from falling on the sidewalk. I frequently brush grass or mulch off of her face after face planting outside. It was at this moment Selah tripped, but this time her delicate head struck the sharp corner of the baseboard.

When I saw my wife pick up our baby, our eyes met briefly. I read her face. Then I heard our baby's cry. Something was wrong. She handed Selah to me so she can quickly get ready. I had to simultaneously hold her arms down, press a washcloth on the wound, and comfort her, all while blood dripped onto the floor, my arms, and my clothes.

Levi came down with shock written on his face...and still wasn't wearing shoes. I'd like to tell you that I kept my cool, but I didn't. I yelled, "shoes, Levi!" My panic made me less tender. Elijah quickly got his flip-flops and started the car, even holding doors open. Driving to the hospital, I could see my boys praying for Selah in the rear view mirror.

Seeing my wife comforting our baby in a hospital bed is a frightening image. Triage questions kept us from talking to one another. I saw my bride, the mother of my children, look at me. I love my wife. She is beautiful. She is a precious gift from God to me. After nearly 14 years of marriage, I can see her eyes and read her heart. She looked terrified. My wife is a strong woman who possesses a confidence in most situations of what to do. Her eyes said she was scared for our baby.

I left my wife and baby daughter, taking the boys for an Icee. I knew it was going to be a long, long day. I got to talk to the boys about hospitals and how God is still in control, and they recalled their times at the hospital. It was there, in that moment in Burger King, when I remembered my prayer from the night before.

The night before, I met with our church's deacons. I had the devotion, which I read Galatians 6:9:
"Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up."
Church leaders are not to give up but rather press on. Part of that pressing on requires rest. Rest causes us to remember our priorities. Rest, which seem counter-productive to our flesh, recalls to mind that our ministry is the Lord's doing, and we are to be dependent upon Him.

I remember my personal prayer later that night. My schedule keeps busying itself. Leading a growing church was taking my time. I prayed that the Lord would remind me of my primary ministry. The next day, He did.
 
Spending several hours in a tiny hospital room has its benefits. For one, my family and I were forced to look at each other. Looking at my lovely, pregnant bride uncomfortably and unselfishly lay in a child's sized hospital bed with our little girl put priorities in perspective for me. Seeing my baby girl endure 10 stitches and an IV, being kept in bed for several hours, had an effect on my mind.

I took the boys for a walk to the gift shop. We talked about everything to glass elevators to watering our garden. A while later, Levi and I went for a walk outside (if you know me well enough, I freeze at warm temperatures). He asked me about tornadoes and whether or not I was strong enough to lift various things he saw around the hospital. My boys look to me for a definition of being a man. More importantly, what it means to be a Godly man.

I'm not a perfect father. When I'm overwhelmed, I panic. I yelled at the boys today. When my day is busy, or stressful, I come home and I don't always give my family the attention I should. My wife doesn't always get my best attention or care. When I'm spent, I'm short with her. Today, I wasn't. Today I listened to my boys. My wife and I spent close moments together. We talked. Looking at Selah's wound and hearing her cry, all of a sudden my job seemed so secondary. Not unimportant, just not as important. 

My heavenly Father doesn't panic. Even when I am annoying, my God listens. He is always good. He is very kind to me, to my family. He is faithful. My Lord has called me to shepherd my family and my church. He has given me joy in both tasks. He has been faithful to not abandon me, even in my unfaithfulness. I have learned that He is a trustworthy and mighty refuge. He is a place of peace. I ran to my Lord, and He answered my prayer today. 

                                       Truly God has listened;
                                                He has attended to the voice of my prayer.

                                       Blessed be God,
                                                because He has not rejected my prayer
                                                or removed His steadfast love from me!

                                                                           (Psalm 66:19-20)

Getting Young Families in the Local Church

“I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes.” –Romans 1:16

Lately, the Lord has placed me into situations not only around Hamilton but across the state of Ohio to discuss the church and disciple-making. Listening to prayer requests from various church leaders, one is nearly universal: please pray that more young families come join our church. I get the sense from these same church leaders that they believe our culture has harder hearts than ever before in history because church marketing, events, and programs from the past are no longer working.

Young people can still be saved. No one is too hard-hearted for the mighty outstretched arm of the Lord whose love endures forever (Psalm 136:12). What if getting young people to attend church services and events is a misunderstanding of Jesus’s Great Commission? These things are not wrong to do, but they make terrible replacements for personal disciple-making.

The gospel of Jesus Christ passionately shared from the lips of a Christian is the power of God to save those who believe. The same power that raised Jesus from the dead can be in your mouth! When you, dear reader, proclaim the gospel, it is like Christ at the tomb of Lazarus calling the dead man to walk. 

You, dear Christian, are commanded to personally proclaim the gospel and personally make disciples of Jesus (Matthew 28:18-20). No matter your age, you can proclaim the gospel that saves to your neighbor no matter their age, for the gospel is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes. Open your home, your dinner table, your living room, your life to your neighbors, then open your mouth to proclaim His gospel.

You dear Christian reading this, go and make disciples of Jesus to all peoples and teach them the Word without shame or hesitation. For God is good and He is mighty to save.

Heavenly Father, bless Your servants with confidence in Your Son’s gospel and Your power to save. May we be found faithful to proclaim this glorious gospel to everyone. O Lord, save our hearers! Strengthen Your church! We ask for Your power and strength in the authority of Christ’s Name. Amen.

My Prayer with Selah Joy

God has blessed my wife and I with a little girl, Selah Joy Hancock. She was born March 10th, 2015. Our first daughter.









I pray that our God would be gracious to my wife and I as parents. May He bless us sinners with His Spirit through His Word. Bless us the unwise, O Lord, with Your wisdom. Bless us the stumblers, O Lord, with the Light unto our feet. Bless us the unloving, O Lord, with Your unfailing love.
Be kind to us, O Lord, and may Your Word be on our hearts to teach our children and lead them in Your everlasting way. May we show Christ to Selah, in our instruction to her and our lives before her. Bless our marriage to display the love of Christ to His church.
You and You alone, O Lord, are our righteousness. Apart from Christ, we have no righteousness, no wisdom, and we can do nothing. We rejoice in Your grace that we are found in Christ. Jesus is the propitiation of our sins, the treasure of our heart, the delight of our life.
In Your grace, O Lord, You display Your perfect patience in these sinners' lives. Display Your glory in the life of our family, in our parenting, in our worship of You. Your Name is great and we delight in the work of Your hands. You have knitted my daughter in my wife's womb. You have been kind to Your servants and blessed us with an arrow to sharpen with Your Word. May we be found faithful to the glory of Your great Name.

October 2014 Newsletter

“See with what large letters I am writing to you with my own hand” (Galatians 6:11).

In the history of God’s creation, we live in an amazing time of technology. Never before have we been so instantly connected by things like cell phones and social media. Yet, it seems that the instant access and connection has made life seem more and more impersonal.

The Apostle Paul had people write as he spoke aloud letters, but at the end of his letter to the church in Galatia, he wrote with his own large handwriting, which is his way of making a personal mark to his letter. Paul had so many personal touches to his writing. In Philippians, Paul expresses his joy in remembering the Philippian church in prayer (1:3) and even longs for all of them with the affection of Christ Jesus (1:8). 

Being a church, or a group of transformed and transforming sinners by the grace of Jesus Christ, we are commanded to love one another (John 13:34).  Express your love and care for others in the church. For example, a simple text of encouragement, a letter of gratitude, or even meeting face to face to share concerns and cares for each other.

No matter how advanced technology gets or how busy our lives are, we as redeemed disciples of Jesus are called to be closer and more loving than any worldly relationships. We remain personable, for our God became flesh and dwelt among us. Let us strive for such loving relationships for joy in the church and for the glory of our gracious God and Savior Christ Jesus the Lord.